Tag: Poetry

Poetry

Changed Woman

Jill L. Ware

Let me say this loud and clear,

Don’t always believe of me what you hear.

My mind has been partitioned-rearranged,

Rendering my previous behaviors changed.

Learning to say no and stand my ground,

Hasn’t left many of my so called friends around.

With me that’s absolutely fine,

I truly enjoy alone most of the time.

For those I use to enable,

Feel free to sit at a different table.

Maybe you’ll learn to take care of you,

I have done all I can do.

From here on out I must take care of me,

I am a changed woman, watch and see!

Jill L. Ware

Blog, I could be worse

I could be so much worse

Jill L. Ware

As I sit here getting my chemo treatment, I watch and listen to those around me. I am blessed. There are so many in pain and sick from their treatments. Over the years I see patients come and go. Some are now cancer free others didn’t beat their disease. I really appreciate the life God has given me. The beautiful friends and family that I’ve been blessed to have in my life. Thankful that these treatments are helping my RA remain under control. I can be more active with my grandkids than I was able to be with my sons. I know there may come a day when this treatment no longer works for me, so until then I will enjoy my family and live my life to it’s fullest.

Poetry

Time For Me

Jill L. Ware

Putting others needs before my own, it is a behavior that I’ve always known.

Never learning to say No, making it impossible to just go.

I need some quite time just for me, a place to go and just Be.

Exhaustion isn’t far away, it’s lurking just around the Bay.

I am busy as can be, slowing down is only up to me.

My body is weak as my mind races on, my strength nearly gone.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I’m sure No is a word you won’t hear me say.

I’ll try to find strength to carry on, after all every day starts with a new dawn.

I just want to find time for myself!

Every one smiles for pictures!

Blog

The Two Paths

Jill L. Ware

These photos are like my life. One minute nice and smooth and the next rough terrain. It’s how we handle the ride that’s important. The more of the rough waters we survive the more we appreciate the smoother paths. Our trials are what make us who we are, helps build our character. Sometimes for the better, other times not so much.

Hope on the horizon!

Blog

Wondering Aimlessly

Jill L. Ware

Do you ever catch yourself going from place to place to place and feeling like you don’t belong anywhere. Or sometimes you can be in a room full of people and feel like you’re completely alone. That’s how I have felt the past two days. I go somewhere and stay five or 10 minutes and have an itch to go somewhere else for five or 10 minutes. I can’t seem to shut my brain down. I’m concentrating to much on the negative crap instead of the important things. I think I need more grandma time. Although, Anaya did tell me she wanted to see her daddy give me a spanking the other day. She is always good for a laugh or two. I had my first full day of the shop open and handled it well. It’s bed time and tomorrow is a new day. I have the house to myself. I’ll pray for inspiration.

Poetry

I Am She

Jill L. Ware

She lived her life only for that day,

Walking alone and scared.

If she knew the world would be this way,

She never would have cared.

She cries herself to sleep,

To her, his promises he’d never keep.

Her pillow soaking up the tears,

To her months felt like years.

How he truly felt she was unaware,

Otherwise, she wouldn’t of followed him everywhere.

He wasn’t just her friend,

Sooner or later it was destined to end.

She plays scenarios over in her head,

She’s sure his actions weren’t misread.

She knows it wasn’t a lie,

That he loved her and didn’t have to try.

It seems 100 years have gone by,

He rejects her, I don’t know why.

She will forgive him once again,

So that her mind he doesn’t win.

I am she,

And no longer need him to love me.

Jill L. Ware

#depression #love #bipolar #borderline

Poetry

This Man

Jill L. Ware

He Knows all of my secrets,

Yet he loves me.

There are no regrets,

With me he desires to be.

He has a temper at times,

Not near as harsh as mine.

We’ve been friends for so long,

There is no way this can go wrong.

He holds me and lets me cry,

Spoils me, that I can’t deny.

I’ve been told, of me he’s afraid,

It’s been long enough his debt should be paid.

It doesn’t make me feel good,

If I could change it I would.

I can’t forget what he did,

For many years what he hid.

Just when I think we can move on,

Again the trust is gone.

If I could just forgive his digressions,

With one of his obsessions.

I love him, he is my mate,

I pray for us it’s not to late.

Jill L. Ware

#bipolar #infidelity

Always working to please me!
Poetry, Quiet Please

Quiet Please

Jill L. Ware

                          Quiet Please

I wish I could slow down, take a break.

I thought it would be different at the lake.

But my mind just does not stop,

My brain is full, about to pop.

What was it I forgot to do,

I’m sorry if I yelled at you.

Straighten the rug please,

Hurry before someone sees.

Who cares if it’s not straight,

Hurry before it’s to late,

I hate that I am manic,

But it isn’t going to make me panic.

Don’t worry it’s not my first episode,

It ‘ll be better after I explode.

Just pray you aren’t the one in my path,

Or likely it will be you that catches my wrath

I am nice as most of you see,

But it’s not all fun to be me.

I struggle to keep my head straight,

Sometimes feeling I never left the gate.

Now my brain isn’t so wired,

In matter of fact I am quite tired.

I’ll pray for tomorrow to be a better day,

So off to bed I am on my way.

                                           Jill L. Ware

Be Still like the water. #bipolar #borderlinepersonalitydisorder