Tag: love

Blog

Annabelle

Jill L. Ware

I watch if she slips away from me each day.

She cannot see me, or hear what I say.

Many times, she watched over me when I was bedridden, her agenda not hidden. She, my faithful companion nursing me.

Soon My turn to nurse her it will be.

As the days go on, she makes it outside to relieve herself less, but, she tries her best.

Annabelle is strong and has a fight in her since birth. I miss the days she slept with me, went to work with me. We were great together.

It seems as if our time together is nearing its end. I pray that she goes on her own, to her death I cannot her send.

I will hold my love for her deep in my heart, even after this earth she parts.

Poetry

Game Over

Jill L. Ware

I saw you yesterday, in this game with you I play.

Keeping my distance so you don’t see, it is way past time to let it be.

I make sure not to cross the line, the game not yours but mine.

My schemes planned days ahead, our relationship a long time dead.

To get your approval I tried for years, my love for life reduced to tears.

The words you said I hear as if yesterday,  you had no clue in my head they’d stay.

I look in the mirror as I become skin and bones, my self esteem someone else owns.

It doesn’t matter large or small, I’m not sure you loved me at all.

I pray one day to adapt a love for me, maybe then there will be no fear of letting you see. I’ll know there is nothing wrong with me.

Blog, Poetry

Faithful Companion

Jill L. Ware
A companion can come in many shapes and sizes. Mine happens to be in the form of a dog. She has seen me through many of battles with those that were supposed to be faithful companions. Her loyalty to me always holds true. Annabelle joined me when my oldest son left home after high school. She has seen me cry, scream, laugh, and sometimes act a complete nutcase. Yet she has never left me or judged me. I can’t even remember how many times I’ve moved, there she was at my side with no judgment, as always. We both have aged since our first meeting. Not long from now. I will be missing her scratching the food bowl at 2 AM and her snoring. A more faithful friend I shall never meet.
Blog, Poetry

Grandparents that raise their grandchildren

Jill L. Ware

Over the years I’ve had many grandparents raising grandkids frequent my place of employment. Have always had respect for them. Until recently, I had no idea how exhausting and stressful it could be. My son and his wife went on a four-day vacation and I stayed with the three kids. It was absolutely exhausting. The minute my butt cheeks hit the couch. There was one screaming “grandma come here”. The meals, laundry, baths and picking up never ends. What I’m getting at is that if you see grandparents raising grandkids, pat them on the back. I only did it for four days, and was ready to lose my sanity.

Blog

Same Thoughts Different Reactions

Jill L. Ware
My mind is like a carnival ride

About this time last year I posted a very emotional and hysterical post about all the scary things taking place in the world. And at a later date after watching it again, I removed it.

I was embarassed by my tears and emotional video. What a difference a year makes. A year of the right phsychiatric meds. Today I feel all the things I did the day I recorded the video. My reaction to those thought is 100% different.

When I started this venture I promised I would post the good and the ugly. I wasn’t true to my word by deleting it. In the future I will do better at being honest and open about my behaviors. I hope that one day even just one of my post helps you in this very exhausting struggle to pretend to be normal.

Blog

Rosella The Cat Without Rear Paws

Jill L. Ware

Rosella was adopted from the humane society 7 years ago. She has no rear paws, and for a long time a angry bladder problem. Until recently she had never been outside. She started going to the door and meowing. I’ve been taking her on small outings. Not far because her nubs are tender and need to toughen up. She is a beautiful sweet kitty. I adopted her because her name is the same as my grandmothers.