The last time I saw these pairs they weren’t parents. What a joy to see them come visit us every time we are out to the lake.
Tag: Poetry
The Two Paths
These photos are like my life. One minute nice and smooth and the next rough terrain. It’s how we handle the ride that’s important. The more of the rough waters we survive the more we appreciate the smoother paths. Our trials are what make us who we are, helps build our character. Sometimes for the better, other times not so much.
Wondering Aimlessly
Do you ever catch yourself going from place to place to place and feeling like you don’t belong anywhere. Or sometimes you can be in a room full of people and feel like you’re completely alone. That’s how I have felt the past two days. I go somewhere and stay five or 10 minutes and have an itch to go somewhere else for five or 10 minutes. I can’t seem to shut my brain down. I’m concentrating to much on the negative crap instead of the important things. I think I need more grandma time. Although, Anaya did tell me she wanted to see her daddy give me a spanking the other day. She is always good for a laugh or two. I had my first full day of the shop open and handled it well. It’s bed time and tomorrow is a new day. I have the house to myself. I’ll pray for inspiration.
I Am She
She lived her life only for that day,
Walking alone and scared.
If she knew the world would be this way,
She never would have cared.
She cries herself to sleep,
To her, his promises he’d never keep.
Her pillow soaking up the tears,
To her months felt like years.
How he truly felt she was unaware,
Otherwise, she wouldn’t of followed him everywhere.
He wasn’t just her friend,
Sooner or later it was destined to end.
She plays scenarios over in her head,
She’s sure his actions weren’t misread.
She knows it wasn’t a lie,
That he loved her and didn’t have to try.
It seems 100 years have gone by,
He rejects her, I don’t know why.
She will forgive him once again,
So that her mind he doesn’t win.
I am she,
And no longer need him to love me.
Jill L. Ware
#depression #love #bipolar #borderline
This Man
He Knows all of my secrets,
Yet he loves me.
There are no regrets,
With me he desires to be.
He has a temper at times,
Not near as harsh as mine.
We’ve been friends for so long,
There is no way this can go wrong.
He holds me and lets me cry,
Spoils me, that I can’t deny.
I’ve been told, of me he’s afraid,
It’s been long enough his debt should be paid.
It doesn’t make me feel good,
If I could change it I would.
I can’t forget what he did,
For many years what he hid.
Just when I think we can move on,
Again the trust is gone.
If I could just forgive his digressions,
With one of his obsessions.
I love him, he is my mate,
I pray for us it’s not to late.
Jill L. Ware
#bipolar #infidelity
Quiet Please
Quiet Please
I wish I could slow down, take a break.
I thought it would be different at the lake.
But my mind just does not stop,
My brain is full, about to pop.
What was it I forgot to do,
I’m sorry if I yelled at you.
Straighten the rug please,
Hurry before someone sees.
Who cares if it’s not straight,
Hurry before it’s to late,
I hate that I am manic,
But it isn’t going to make me panic.
Don’t worry it’s not my first episode,
It ‘ll be better after I explode.
Just pray you aren’t the one in my path,
Or likely it will be you that catches my wrath
I am nice as most of you see,
But it’s not all fun to be me.
I struggle to keep my head straight,
Sometimes feeling I never left the gate.
Now my brain isn’t so wired,
In matter of fact I am quite tired.
I’ll pray for tomorrow to be a better day,
So off to bed I am on my way.
Jill L. Ware
Take Action
Take Action
I’m an older version of who I was at seventeen.
Trying to forget where I’ve been and what I’ve seen.
Finding joy to the left and to the right.
To these old eyes is quite a sight.
Sticks and stones will break your bones.
And words will destroy you.
Fantasize, dream, take action.
Get going while you have traction.
You are what holds you back,
Self esteem you lack.
It was taken away,
It will return one day.
Surround yourself with good,
Life will be better than you ever thought it could.
Smile, laugh, cry and live,
You have more than you will ever know to give.
Jill L. Ware
#depression #anxiety #Borderlinepersonalitydisorder #bipolar
Quarantine
Quarantine
The majority of our country is quarantined,
From a virus called COVID-19.
Many of us afraid, as we should be.
Restrictions have been made, now we wait and see.
This does not only affect me,
For thousands of deaths there will be.
Please tell family and friends to stay away,
They can come visit another day.
Pray that our wait isn’t long,
And that the statistics are wrong.
When this finally ends,
Will normal ever be again?
#quarantine #bipolar #borderlinepersonality
Borderline Personality Disorder
You are a true bitch, changing things at the drop of a hat.
Then the flip of a switch, everything is okay just like that.
When you love it is to the extreme, changing in an instant becoming hateful and mean.
Then you finally feel you belong, only to find you were wrong.
Approval you will always seek, I believe it makes you weak.
Open wounds do not scar, you just want to be loved for who you are.
The pain of the past doesn’t have to last. Talk about it hand it to the savior, the fire is lit changing your behavior.
You may not be as good as before, but a bitch you will be no more.
Jill L. Ware
Addiction Is No Racist
Red, yellow, green or blue, She will come after you.
No matter what gender, to her promises you will surrender.
She comes disguised as many things, with her chaos and lies she brings.
Sex, drugs and food to name a few, she will control all you do.
Not much to say you feel depleted, if she has her way you’ll be deleted.
You can tell her to find another, you are someone’s brother.
Hold your head up high, it won’t be easy I can’t lie.
Show her you are stronger than she, forever rehabilitated you will be.
Jill L. Ware
Our Roses Were Yellow 
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